If It Please The Court Free Download
Game Overview
Seduce and surveil as a sexy royal spy! Gather intel, or gamble on love in 18th-century Versailles. Who will catch your eye: a spymistress, a poet, or a traitor to the king? If It Please the Court is a 242,000 word interactive lesbian romance novel by D.E. Chaudron, where your choices control the story. It’s entirely text-based, without graphics or sound effects, and fueled by the vast, unstoppable power of your imagination. You’ve been recruited from the slums of Paris into the Secret du Roi, Louis XV’s league of covert emissaries and spies. As a spy for the court, you now have the power to change your life–and tip an unstable country toward transformation. It’s one thing to lie for a living, but your love life demands honesty. And women all over Versailles are ready to lure your heart. Will it be the spymistress with a lifetime of secrets, the poet languishing in the shadow of the queen, or the double agent haunting your every move? No matter who you pursue, you’ll have to survive a rival’s hostile ambitions, and see that the Crown doesn’t crush yours. Love and loyalty is all that will be left when this house of cards falls. Who will you protect to ensure a better future, and who will you sacrifice? When your mask falls away, will anyone trust the person underneath?
- Play as female or nonbinary, as cis or trans.
- Experience sapphic romance in the 1700s: play as lesbian, bi, and/or asexual.
- Generalize or specialize: hone your senses, master disguise, pen the finest letters, wield a duelist’s blade, and woo with a silver tongue.
- Empower the crown, subvert the king, or betray France to its enemies.
- Reunite your family, expose your father’s past, or sever all ties.
- Take a slow burn path for romance or cut to the chase with seduction.
- Stir a revolution among the citizenry, or fall in with the nobles.
Installation Instructions
- Click the green button below to be redirected to UploadHaven.
- Wait 15 seconds, then hit “Free Download.” (Free downloads may be slower — upgrade to UploadHaven Pro for faster speeds.)
- Once downloaded, right-click the .zip file and choose “Extract to If It Please The Court.” (You’ll need 7-Zip for this.)
- Open the extracted folder and run the game as administrator.
- Enjoy! 🎮 If you see missing DLL errors, check the _Redist folder inside and install what’s needed.
Download Links
Download If It Please The Court using the button below.
Setup Guide & Troubleshooting
How do I fix missing DLL errors for If It Please The Court?
After extracting If It Please The Court, navigate to the _Redist or _CommonRedist folder inside the game directory and install DirectX, Vcredist, and any other dependencies included.
What should I do if the downloaded file is corrupted?
The full archive is 89.46 MB — make sure your download completed fully before extracting. Use 7-Zip to extract the files. If you still see a "file corrupted" error, re-download and try again.
Why should I run the game as administrator?
Right-click the game executable and select "Run as Administrator" to avoid save file issues and permission errors. This is especially important on the first launch.
How do I update my GPU drivers for this game?
The game won't launch — what should I try?
Try running in compatibility mode, install the latest DirectX runtime, or install the All-in-One VC Redist Package.
My antivirus is blocking the game — is it safe?
Antivirus false positives are common with pre-installed games. Temporarily pause your antivirus during extraction to prevent it from quarantining game files. You can re-enable it after the extraction completes.
Screenshots
